“Our youth now love luxury, they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders, and they love to chatter instead of exercise. Children are now tyrants not servants of their household. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up their food and tyrannize their teachers.” 

This sentiment was expressed by Socrates over 2,400 years ago. Reading this may lead some to the conclusion that nothing is new under the sun!

This Shabbat we will begin our celebration of Sukkot and during the holiday we will read the book of Kohelet (Eccelestiastes). I love this sacred text of wisdom with its deep contemplations about life, purpose, and its understanding of human nature. When I was preparing to speak with parents at Curriculum Night and inadvertently came across this quote from Socrates, it occurred to me that if you compare the text of Kohelet with the sentiments of the Greek philosopher, Socrates, you can make some interesting connections.

At first glance, Socrates’ critique on the kids of his time might seem like the cynical words from a grumpy old man. But then I had an “Aha” moment -  Every generation seems to struggle with the perceived lack of respect, discipline, and humility of the younger generation. Socrates’ sentiment finds its place in the thoughts of Kohelet as well.

Kohelet learns from his experiences that, "What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun." - Kohelet 1:9.  Kohelet’s wisdom reveals the repetitive nature of the human experience. Just as the sun rises and sets, human behaviors, including the friction between generations, are recurring themes. The very issues that Socrates complained about in his time were present when I was growing up and are present today. That recognition actually brought me peace, wrapped in a bit of ironic humor. The challenges we face aren't new, but rather, a part of the human experience - human nature.  It also tells us what was true about child development 2400 years ago is still true today.

Kohelet recognizes behaviors come and behaviors go. While Socrates critiques the behaviors of the children and teens, Kohelet would respond by questioning the lasting  concern of any human behavior. As educators and parents, understanding this behavior, as a function of development should reinforce for us that our focus must always be on teaching values that transcend these transitory behaviors. Nothing really changes, or ever has - children come into this world needing patience, love and guidance. 

Socrates complains about the loss of respect for the elders, while Kohelet offers a balanced view, recognizing that each generation has its moments - both filled with wisdom and foolishness.  There is a time for everything!

We need to be reminded that children are a work in progress, and as they progress, they will challenge us, as they should, requiring us to remain steadfast, providing them with role models and a value-rich environment.  Instead of focusing on what they aren't doing right according to past norms, we can appreciate their unique strengths and teach them from where they are.

Children always have and always will challenge their elders as they grow. That is how they individualize. And while there is nothing new under the sun, each generation brings a new context to the human experience.  That is why there will always be generational differences.

"So I commend the enjoyment of life because there is nothing better for a person under the sun than to eat and drink and be glad." - Kohelet 8:15.  Kohelet’s wisdom suggests to us that since we will never understand the mysteries of life, including the persistent human condition - enjoy the journey of life, including raising our children, even in times of frustration. Celebrate their talents and gifts, listen to their perspectives with tenderness, teach them our values and traditions, help them to honor the past while embracing the present and the future. For, as Kohelet reminds us - all has been given by God.

So, the  next time your children behave inappropriately, speak disrespectfully, espouse ideas different from yours - stop and think about Socrates and Kohelet and remind yourself “nothing is new under the sun.” Teach and guide them with patience and love.